Late Summer

FoMo remedy, and a late summer playlist

As the heat settles out, and the season changes, I have been thinking back over the past year.

It has certainly been one of the hardest years of my life. The end of an 8 year long relationship, the realization of an addiction I wasn’t aware of, the resulting withdrawal process and reality of sleeping less than 4 hours a night for months—(and still not sleeping normally almost six months later)—has all compounded in me questioning a lot, examining a lot, and, to be honest, not experiencing very much outside of my own small life, my own small mind.

I have learned that I was a scattered, irritable, forgetful person for four of five years of the relationship I was in. I wasn’t showing up as well as I could for the people in my life, or myself. It’s with deep regret that I eat my slices of humble pie, realizing that me, the person who has chosen to emphasize what I see as a healthy life and direction, was actually, at my core, deluding myself about what some of my needs were, and how a lack of getting them met was affecting me. You can only fake it for so long, I guess. You can only tough it out for a while, until you break.

Today this sentence came to me—

An experience that can’t be digested, used, or appreciated is better forgone.

I think it’s a pretty good FoMo cure, really.

It offers a third option for missing out or going to something: the option of contentment, of non-doing, of just hanging around with yourself, or whoever/whatever is already at hand.

Anyway, I just wanted to share the playlist I’ve been working on lately, that’s the real purpose of this newsletter. I hope you enjoy it. It’s just called Late Summer.

Pro Tip: The Apple Music version has a Joanna Newsom track Spotify doesn’t have.

— Hudson